Date:    Thu, 5 Sep 1996 16:50:52 -0600
From:    John <jwwest@UALR.EDU>
Subject: Revised Retirement Plan RESPONSE

A couple years ago the REVISED RETIREMENT PLAN came to
our office.  My supervisor at the time responded with this
**********************************************
TO:       Management
FROM:     Older Employees
SUBJECT:  Revised Retirement Plan


Those of us classified as older workers have had enough of
the RAPE (Retire Aged Personnel Early) by our Mangement.

We have undergone our final SCREW (Survey of Capabilities of
Retired Early Workers) and can no longer take it lying down.
Many of us have bent over backwards for the numerous SHAFTS
(Study by Higher Authority Following Termination)
perpetrated by the company.  Our ranks are replete with
individuals affected by HERPES (Half Earnings for Retired
Personnel Early Severance),  CLAP (Combined Lump-sum
Assistance Payments), and AIDS (Additional Income from
Dependents of Spouses), and we will not tolerate anymore.

We have initiated class action through the Federation of
Unappreciated and Chastised Unemployed.

FUCU will be our official response.